I MISS YOU

Dear boyfriend, this is for you.

100. You always smell good, with or without cologne. It’s just your own scent.

99. You are incredibly handsome. Even when you are going wolfman… Hehehe did I make you laugh?

98. You are always encouraging and supportive of me!

97. You have a really amazing smile, it is not just something I see, obviously.

96. You have so much passion for brawl and making something out of yourself and you always want to excel. I know you can do anything you want to do. I have faith in you.

95. Your singing voice. It’s totally super duper adorable especially when you sing too me. :)

94. Your voice when you mock me. :)

93. You are so sweet and so honest. You tell me everything.

92. Your hand movements you make when you are excited or talking. And how you’re always hyped :P

91. You always showed me you cared, even when it was hard. I know you love me because you still loved me through everything.

90. You put up with me and you are so patient because I know I am not easy to deal with.

89. You always have a goodbye hug for me when you'll go home

88. You are straight forward and you make me face the things I try to avoid.

87. You see all of me, even the disgusting and dark secrets I share with no one else, and love me because of what I am.

86. You would never ever be little me just for the sake of making me feel bad about myself.

85. You think I am the most beautiful creature and you are obviously very blind. I think that is you, inside and out.

84. You love to cuddle.

83. You always ask how my day is going.

82. No matter who you are with, I know if something is wrong I can depend on you.

81. You are careless and I am careful. As in I am always nervous and you are going with the flow. I am obviously the klutz, though. But you still think its cute hehe.

80. You eat like a mad man when you’re really hungryyy and you always ask me if I am hungry or thirsty or anything to make sure I am comfortable. But I am already always comfortable with you.

79. You make me feel safe, even though no one can necessarily make the world safe for anyone else.

78. You make me fall more and more in love with you every day.

77. You watch sponge bob cartoon because you know it will make me happy even you're a little bit don't like it

76. You don’t care what anyone has to say about me and you, even though everyone has their own opinion.

75. You care about things I care about and want to learn more about them. Like my stories.

76. You are so annoying and aggravating when you make my tummy tickled, but i love it.

75. You apologize and always have good reasons behind them, even after I ask “Why are you sorry for?” or “for what reason”.

74. You always say you are not a nice guy or that you could be mean but you are that nice guy with me. I like that I make you the nice guy, because that is how I have always seen you. Even through us not talking :P

73. You teach me plenty of things about life and love and just everything.

72. You are so determined to make us work and you won’t let anything get in between.

71. How our skin feels when we are pressed against each other.

70. You always teach me to be better women in this wild world.

69. You always pick me up, even when I tell you don’t have too. You tell me it your job as a boyfriend.

68. You love my smell hair :)))

67. I love tasting your lips on mine.

66. You cried in front of me. It sounds mean but, I mean it in a way where it made you so real.

65. Sometimes you always do stupid thing that makes me laugh. haha

64. I love how you get so animated when you talk about things that you are passionate about.

63. You are not like anyone else in the way you take care of me and how you talk to me and how you act with me.

62. You always think about me and what I like. You definitely make me your number one priority and no guy has ever and will ever do that for me besides YOU!

61. You make me want to be a better person and actually want to do well in everything. I know I never have to impress you; I just want you to be proud of me, always.

60. You will wait until I am ready, no matter how long it takes.

59. You make my day better the moment I see you.

58. You would never try to change me. You love me how I am. You take me as I am. You love me for who I am even if the way I do things frustrates you you’re still here.

57. You give me confidence and make me feel strong, and that is so hard to do since I feel weak all the time. But you do that for me, and I want you to know that I am thankful for it. I admire the confidence I see in you as well.

56. You tell me I look attractive and lovely when I am clearly not at my best like in pajamas and I smell like drool my hairs all effed up like a birds nest etc

55. The way you rest your head on my chest and listen to the silly things I have to say.

54. You make so happy to be alive and blessed I found you. You are my reason for everything.

53. You are my angel; I remember telling you this but it truly was like I was drowning, and you saved me. You’re my savior.

52. You always forgive me when I say I am sorry and you know I mean it. Even when I tell you I’m sorry repeatedly: P

51. The way we joke/talk to each other is so funny. Everyone thinks it is abnormal but who said we were normal? Plus weird is better than normal, right?!?!!!

50. You make me giggly and nervous and you hands sweat but you still hold my hands anyway. It is so adorable.

49. You can give me super goose bumps just by kissing me. Not to mention the chills that goes down my spine!

48. How you never stick to the plan; always making up things as you go. But when we have plans you do stick to them.

47. That cutesy-smile you give me, giving me the hint that you weren’t paying attention to anything I said, but you pay attention to ME.

46. You know when I am mad and you never give up until you know the reason why.

45. You always remember our memories. it makes me feel that i am important.

44. You kiss my forehead.

43. You are so adorable even when you are just sitting down doing nothing. You are my absolute favorite thing to look at!

42. You are sharing your life with me and you have turned mine around.

41. Every love song reminds me of you, not even including my list of songs :)

40. You put me before everyone else. Like I said number one priority.

39. You turn to me when you need to unwind and I love that you entrust so much in me.

38. You are the strongest person I know, with everything you do. you’re the strongest person I know.

37. You include me in everything in your life.

36. You always makes me feel safe with your hug

35. How you always want to be massaged and always massage me and my super tense back and sore feet when I asked.

34. You and the way you crack you knuckles when I give you love bites.

33. The way you say “I miss you, Angel”.

32. You tolerate my friends even though you don’t like some because you know it will make me happy.

31. I hug while you take ma a ride and you try to be careful because you know I am anxious.

30. I can spend hours with you and it won’t feel like enough.

29. You make me miss you so much it hurts in a good and bad way. These other girls don’t have as much to miss as I do because you have everything I need.

28. Since we first met, i never imagined that we'll being in love like this. I am so grateful everything worked out even if it is a work in progress. You’re my fairytale and my happily ever after. You’re my prince charming.

27. You make me the happiest when I am feeling the worst.

26. When I am trailing kisses down your neck and chest and I just know you can’t hold your smirk in.

25. You bring out the best in me. It is so cliché but it is so fitting for you and me.

24. You listen when I tell you long stories that have no meanings.

23. You make me crazy and I make you crazy and somehow it is healthy. Were crazy for each other.

22. You are not embarrassed when I call you things like honey bunny and unyu inyi minyi . haha

21. You are not afraid to tell me your feelings.

20. The way you always want to hug me.

19. You always stroke my hair when I am lying on your chest.

18. You are always there to take care of me.

17. You are a real man because you can love someone more than you love yourself.

16. You never ever take advantage of me.

15. You always want to please me.

14. You understand me even when I am crying hysterically and I don’t know how.

13. We’ve lived without each other before and we both know that is not how it was supposed to be. That proved a lot.

12. You showed me what destiny and faith and hope and love really are about and I’ll forever be grateful.

11. You make me feel the warmth in your touch effortlessly.

10. Because of you, no matter what may come tomorrow, today my life is more complete.

9. You are my very boy friend in every way possible. Never EVER forget that. No one else comes close to that.

8. I can never leave you, not that I want to, you are just so magnetic I always come right back like a rubber band.

7. I can tell you anything without fear of being judged.

6. You make me face my greatest fears even if I don’t know it.

5. Your undying faith is what keeps our love alive, even for the past few months, together or not.

4. How you always tell me I can achieve my dreams, but you don’t know that I already have because I have you now.

3. You are always the one who can make me feel better when I am sad.

2. You’ve shown me the greatest love I have ever felt, “I MISS YOU, ANGEL”

1. You could be my priest :)

20 DAYS AFTER YOU'RE LEAVE ME

i'm miles from where you are, i pray that something pick me up and

sets me down in your warm arms ...

i can't wait for the days where we can walk around together, stay in my bed all day if we want. we'll ave a tickle fight anytime, watch movies, eat ice cream and have a dinner. then at the end of day, we can fall asleep in each other's arms knowing we'll still be next to each other when we wake up in the morning. it will be perfect !

everyday, my love for you will not change. Actually, it grows as each day passes. And everyday, I'm missing you and wanting you to be by my side. I don't need this day to make me feel more in desire for you. I love you, even from 734 miles away.

it's not gonna be easy, it's gonna be really hard but we've gonna have to work at this everyday, but i wanna do that because i want you, all of you... forever.

I MISS YOUR KISS IN MY FOREHEAD :((((((

MY SPECIAL BIRTHDAY

2 days ago, February 15th 2011. it was my birthday...

I am very grateful for my birthday this year coincides with the birthday of Prophet Muhammad.
This year was very meaningful, because Allah has given me so many experiences that are very valuable in my life, and I can turn myself into a better life in this 20th year.
even though my family can not exist on my birthday, but I'm sure they wished all the best for me.
My bestfriend give a surprise birthday cake ( REDVO and CHIPAU ) and i love it so much !
Everybody said "Happy Birthday, Angel. Wish you all the best" . i appreciate it !

this birthday cake from my best freind, Redvo

after i got a surprise birthday cake from my Redvo, the 2nd suprise i got from my Chipau ( Adi, Yono, Zahra ) with Rendy and Restu but i forgot to take a picture a birthday cake from Chipau :( it was a cappuccino cheese cake, sound delicious right? :))))

and last but not least, before i got all surprise from my best friend. My boyfriend ( Faisal Rachman ) give me a very special wishes.

actually, it's sooooo sad when i've my birthday but he's not beside me but i understand with this LDR :( and i realize that a few day before my birthday. you know what? even tough he's not beside me but he's successful makes me feel like he was here, he makes me sooooo happy because he always there to give me a BIG STRENGTH and he makes me everyday i fallin' love with him :))))

oh what i miss him so much :'(

Thank you for the 2 surprise birthday party ( Redvo and Chipau ), thanks for all the words and wishes from all friend, and thank you for always love me until this day ( Faisal Rachman )

my board house, reminds me of you :)

This blog will tell you about part of my room that always remind me of you. Today i come back to my board house after your departure to Balikpapan and i realize that for 6 month later you would not come here :( so here they are...

THE LAPTOP

Do you know why i put this Acer Aspire 4930 to our memories? My laptop with the solitaire game? Yeah, because in this spot you asked me “Do you want to be my girlfriend? Do you want to have a relationship with me?” i didn’t believe when you’re said that. I just tough you’re kidding me because ‘how come a boy ask a girl to be his girlfriend while he play the solitaire?’ hahaha but i knew you’re just too nervous like i did. That’s my romantic awkward moment even tough without a rose, without a back sound, without a chocolate, ONLY YOU AND ME :)

THE BED

This is my favorite spot, we spend all day long together, we have a tickle fight, we have a nap together, laugh and cry together. There are so many memories about us and i will never forget it. when you hold my hand for the first time, when you kiss my forehead for the first time, when you hug me for the first time. Do you remember in my bed also you said ‘I LOVE YOU’ a few day before your departure to Balikpapan?hahaha as you know, i already wait you to say that words after the first day you and me become WE :)

THE TOOTH BRUSH

See that two brushes? The white striped green one is mine and the orange one is yours :) i don’t know why i still put your brush, it makes me feel like you are here, use that brush. Hahaha maybe i will change your brush when you are come to my board house again.

THE TOWEL

Hey sayang, this is your tazmania towel right? You always use this towel after you take a shower in my board house and also after you take Wudhu. This towel smell like YOU . hmmmm :p

THE JACKET

You leave your jacket in my board house, it’s very useful for me. It’s warm me when i get cold, it makes me feel like i hug you even tough you are not here :(

THE SAJADDAH

This is the most favorite stuff in my board house. 2 sajadah, 1 mukena for me and 1 sarong for you. Alhamdulillah, we are Muslim couple. I’m very great full to ALLAH SWT, because you are not only could love me with your heart but also you could be my priest. You always teach me how to not afraid with other except Allah SWT, you always teach me how to be a good girl in a wild world with this. YOU are THE ONLY ONE MAN ( after my father ) do that !

***

There are so many spot in my board house that always remind me of you. There’s our little secret too :p I hope you always remember me, even tough we are in long distance relationship. I hope our love strength will keep our faithful :) i’ll be missing you, dear. And i’ll wait you come to my board house on August :)

NIGHTMARE

OMG, gimana bisa gue mimpiin cewek itu lagi??! cewek yang dulu pernah gangguin kehidupan gue ampe bikin gue stres ama sikapnya yang bisa dibilang saiko, cewek yang dulu sangat amat gue benci karena selalu bikin khawatir sama mantan gue itu. FCVK ! dan semalem dia dateng lagi ke mimpi gue? astagfirullah....
dan kali ini dia mengganggu hubungan gue dengan Faisal. dia mengambil perhatian dan merebut perasaan Faisal dari gue, untungnya cuma mimpi. tapi tetep aja serem kalo diinget" mimpi sialan itu. dan di mimpi gue itu, Faisal dengan gampangnya dapat terpengaruh :((( ya untungnya cuma mimpi...
ya Allah, kenapa mesti cewek itu lagi sih?padahal semua alasan tentang kenapa gue benci sama cewek itu udah gue anggap biasa aja, udah gue ikhlasin dan gue maafin meski emang gak akan pernah gue lupain. kenapa mesti cewek itu yang gak ada hubungannya dengan pacar gue yg sekarang? :((

untungnya itu cuma mimpi, mungkin karena guenya yang lagi kangen banget sama Faisal. masih ada sekitar 178 hari lagi untuk menunggu dia balik ke Bandung :( masih panjang hal-hal yang mungkin bakal kejadian dan gue tau apa yang bakal terjadi apa itu bikin gue sama Faisal makin bertahan atau sebaliknya (amit-amit Ya Allah) tapi gue percaya dan yakin kalo Faisal disana juga nggak akan macem-macem karena sebisa mungkin gue jaga kepercayaan dia supaya hubungan kita lancar sampai akhirnya kita ketemu lagi nanti.
untungnya itu cuma mimpi, gue juga gak akan rela kalo Faisal kenapa-napa disana selama jauh dari gue. gue nggak bisa bayangin kalo nantinya hal yang sama kayak nightmare gue itu kejadian beneran :(

sayang, aku kangen. rasanya gak ketemu kamu kali ini beda, jauhnya bener-bener berasa. dan sampai 6 bulan mendatang aku harus membiasakan diri aku tanpa kamu, harus membiasakan diri gak meluk dan dipeluk kamu, membiasakan diri gak dicium kamu, membiasakan diri tertawa tanpa kamu dan disaat aku menangis aku harus membiasakan diri dulu tanpamu yang selalu nenangin aku dgn meluk aku :'(
tapi aku tau demi untuk bertemu kamu 6 bulan mendatang aku harus rela jarak dan waktu memisahkan aku dan kamu, aku rela untuk masa depanmu.
sayang, aku kangen sampai aku tak tahan menahan rasa ini...

i love you, did you know that?

"I want all of you, forever. you and me, everyday"

dear Faisal,

We are 1 hours/nearly 734 miles away and also Java sea separates us. Time passes by too slowly: seconds feel like minutes, minutes feel like hours and hours feel like days…when we’re apart. Everyone is against our love for each other: they say we won’t ever make it in the end, but we’re going to prove them wrong.

i miss you already.i miss everything about you, i miss the time we spent together, i miss the time when i'm with you. there are still about 180 days longer to see you, i'm not fear the next time you'll be changed because i know you are not a man who was easily influenced. everyday i pray that you are okay wherever you are and here i'll keep waiting for you.

I always look forward to the day i get to see you again. I admit, it’s not easy. It’s not easy seeing my couple friends together, it’s not easy having things in my room that constantly remind you of you, it’s not easy just receiving text messages or hearing your voice every night on the phone. Now that i think about it, distance is the last thing i should even be measuring in this relationship; measure my love, and that’s something i can’t even measure myself.

"missing someone gets easier everyday because even though you are one day further from the last time you saw them, you are one day closer to the next time you will."